Gloss Over

Yep… gonna glass over the fact that I have been MIA blogwise for months.

Consider yourself glossed.

What a wonderful Mother’s Day this has been.  I could probably say that every year but it’s always true.

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We finally found a church that we feel very good about attending.  The pastor is engaging, very likable and very intelligent.  The music is upbeat and makes me happy to be worshipping.  The kids program is out of this world awesome.  It’s a homerun.  All that to say, we decided to look into having Lucas dedicated.  We filled out the application last week, sat in on the class as soon as we turned in the application and this week stood before the congregation and agreed to raise him to the best of our ability in Christ’s image.  It was wonderful.  It felt like a completion of parenting that had been left undone.

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Adam surprised me on the way home with a stop to Lowes where we picked up a backyard swing that I have been wanting.  He actually picked a different one than I originally thought but true to form, he was right… this one is WAY better.  It converts from a sitting position to a laying down position which gives it a real hammock swing feel.  Once it was put together, Adam, Chase, Lucas and I spent about an hour swinging on it.  Chase cuddled up next to one of us and Lucas yelling “Dis is SO much fun!”  I took a couple pictures because I never want to forget that hour.

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It was a really awesome day.

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I wasn’t sure I would feel like that because this day always reminds me of my mom and my loss.  I thought I would have a harder time but I didn’t… something I think Pastor Mike helped me with.  A few weeks ago he spoke about death and our perceptions.  He questioned why people say “Oh, how sad, (s)he never got to do XYZ”… in my case “Oh how sad, she (my mom) never got to see her grandchildren”.  He instead encouraged us to see that as a Christian, death is the beginning of something wonderful.  A ‘life’ that here on earth, even in our wildest imaginations, we can’t conceive of.  That ‘XYZ’ can’t compare to the absolute joy and fulfillment that they are now experiencing   He went on to say, sure… be sad for those of us who are left behind… be sad that we have to live without them for a time but don’t be sad for those who are in heaven.

I am sure I am not doing the sermon justice… Pastor Mike is much more eloquent and poignant on stage then I am on my laptop but I hope I am getting my point across.  I’m not sad for her.  I miss her terribly but I don’t want my mom here on earth broken.  I want her healed, whole and basking in God’s presence in heaven.  And I am ok with that.  I have an amazing life filled with sorrows and joys and I thank God for every bit of it.  Best of all, I have the knowledge that I will see her again… this life is only temporary.

Beach Blur

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2 Responses to Gloss Over

  1. Kari says:

    Love this post, Jessi. I love reading these words from you that sound like you have experienced some true healing this year. Hugs!

  2. Joyce Ronci says:

    Your post brought tears to my eyes. So happy for your peace. When we all get to heaven what a day of rejoicing that will be!!!!
    Joyce & Tom
    Love you!

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